Good News… for a Change

Making the leap from grief to hope is possible.

I recently watched a new movie – a western in which the main character committed himself to helping the residents of a town threatened by a bad guy. The plot seemed to suggest that the character had some ulterior motive, perhaps a sense of revenge against the bad guy for a past wrong rather than a simple desire to help the current situation. The character’s close friend counseled him before the big climatic fight by asking: “are you fighting the battle behind you, or the one in front of you?” That question sparked this blog post because too often I rehash the past rather than focusing on what’s in front of me. There is no better example than Christmastime, which can be depressing when you consider the fact that close friends and family members are no longer with you during a season that should be joyous.

As you might imagine, Deb and I often take notice of news articles and stories about grieving parents. Before our time with Jacob, such stories went unnoticed or underappreciated; now its seems that we can’t avoid them. Many stories and blogs we encounter tend to have the same themes: anger, despair, darkness, and accepting a “new normal” that seemingly lacks hope for a positive change. I know that these parents mean well, and I applaud them for opening up and sharing their very honest and raw feelings. And yet, the flow of these blogs seems to lack one key ingredient: Hope.

A short two days after Jacob passed, I wrote a blog entry entitled “All Things New.” The feelings of grief for us at that moment could not have been more keen and real. I re-read that blog entry recently and was amazed at the perspective we had back then. I vaguely recall having a sense of something larger; I even wrote several more articles touching on the idea of trusting God and His plans for us even in the face of chaos, uncertainty, and all of the other emotions that comprise the blog entries of those other parents. Yet, now some 18 months removed from that moment, I am so very grateful for God’s influence in our lives and the outlook we have had.

God works in our lives continuously, whether we realize it or not – whether we acknowledge it or not. This realization was confirmed in a recent sermon during advent title “Good News… for a Change” (courtesy of Rev. William Mueller). Sure, this title seems to reflect the popular opinion that bad news surrounds us and it is nice to have good news for a change. More importantly, however, this message reminded me of God’s gift to us in the form of our savior, Christ Jesus, reconciling us to Him AND what our response should be to this Good News. In other words, this Good News should cause a change in how we approach life.

Life is filled with choices. Many paths are put in our way and I’m convinced that God intends for us to make a choice after consulting Him about His plan for us. For moments like this, I like to think about Robert Frost’s famous poem “The Road Not Taken”. But sometimes the paths are not clear, and the choice is difficult. I would describe the loss of a child as the end of a path rather than a fork in the road. There is really no way to continue on the original path, and there is no apparent alternative path. Instead, it might seem as though you are now closed in by the surrounding forest . There are temptations to become frantic and irrational, fearful of this present problem, or to simply sit down in paralyzed despair. But I have good news! God calls us to seek Him. He provides all of the tools necessary for us to discover a new path – or to even forge a new one! He presents us with this opportunity for a real change.

Another way to demonstrate this concept is the challenge hikers and rock climbers often face. One of the thrills of such adventures is overcoming obstacles in order to achieve a goal – often a destination, or a spectacular view. The obstacles come in myriad forms, including physical exhaustion or natural impediments. The cover photo I chose for this blog entry illustrates such an obstacle – a natural separation between rocks – that is overcome by someone seeking adventure. The faith she shows in her leap across the separation is evident. When you look at this photo, aren’t you hopeful that she will make it across to the other rock? Do you find yourself pulling for her, urging her on? Is there a sense of appreciation and awe that she even made the leap?

So it is with our own obstacle, or the end of a path, when we lose a child. What compels us to continue? What motivates us to overcome the obstacle? I invite you to search for the answer as you gaze upon a Nativity scene, or read Isaiah 53 and Luke 2. As we reflect on our human condition and God’s plan of salvation for us, I pray that a change occurs. I pray that each of us feels what Simeon felt as he praised God passionately when he witnessed Jesus with his own eyes.

Simeon took him in his arms and praised God, saying:

“Sovereign Lord, as you have promised,

    you may now dismiss your servant in peace.

For my eyes have seen your salvation,

    which you have prepared in the sight of all nations:

a light for revelation to the Gentiles,

    and the glory of your people Israel.”

The child’s father and mother marveled at what was said about him.

– Luke 2:28-33

Simeon knew, as he approached the end of his days on earth, that God had a plan for him and all the world. God’s plans are much larger than us, yet at the same time are all for us. This good news should lead to a change in our lives, and encourage us to make that leap and respond to Him in a way that moves us forward.