Held in her hands

(Original appeared April 18, 2016)

Deb got to hold Jacob today! We were both in his room as his nurse was planning to change this bedding. She asked Deb to help, and so the both of them, one on each side of his isolate chamber, and all four of their hands reaching in through the portholes, began the process. The nurse first asked Deb to switch out the blanket underneath him while the nurse held Jacob. As the nurse began to lift him, the nurse then said one of the most profound things: “Why don’t you hold him?” At that moment, without flinching, and in full mom-mode, Deb calmly cradled Jacob in her hands as the nurse switched out the blanket underneath him. For 60 seconds, I doubt Deb and I even took a breath. Then Deb laid him gently down and together she and the nurse worked to tuck him back up and arrange his lines.
Deb turned to me with the biggest smile and then she asked if I took photos of the event. I immediately realized that I had been so engrossed in the moment that I forgot to snap a few pics. The feeling was worse than going on a fishing trip, and after traveling miles into a lake, realizing that you forgot the bait.
I’m sure we’ll have more chances to do this as he continues to grow and I’ll be sure to take some photos next time. But you should all know that Deb and I giggled inside a bit over the fact that our “audience” on CaringBridge will be so disappointed that there’s no photographic evidence of this beautiful moment. I promise to try hard next time =)
Also, while Deb was rearranging him, the nurse changed out his stocking cap. We were able to see his bald head, and his blond eyebrows. What a moment.